Funny Stories
Beginner Orchestra | Caroline | OOPS! | Giving Directions | Snakes! | My Jazz Audition | Crushed Briefcase |
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Caroline was a cellist in orchestra. Well, she was on the roster for orchestra. She never attended a rehearsal – they were before school and even without the rehearsal she was usually late to school.
Each Halloween the orchestra joined the local high school orchestra in for their “Creepy Concert”. It was a lot of fun and the kids and I always dressed up.
The orchestra would take a bus over the to the high school, rehearse, eat pizza, and then play the concert.
Since Caroline was never in rehearsal, I was not going to allow her to play in the concert. I also thought this was obvious and a moot point since she never received the permission slip or information.
During the after school rehearsal, one of my students asked, “Who’s that playing cello?”
I looked over. Yep, Caroline. I smiled, ignored the students question, and moved on. At the least the girl knew how to hold the cello, right?
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We were in the music office – three of us shared one office. It worked out well since we all got along great.
My desk was against the wall with the door. The other two desks were at a ninety degree angle facing the adjacent wall. I was at my desk and could therefore see anyone who walked in the door. Dean was at his desk, trying to straighten things up. As he is shuffling papers, a sweet little sixth grade flutist quietly walks in. We often left the door open and the floor was carpeted.
Dean never noticed the girl, and without looking at me says, “My desk is a f@%&ing mess!”
The girl just froze, eyes wide and pupils darkening. Dean looked up at me and then saw the girl. He jumped and his eyes got large! I couldn’t stop laughing.
He wasn’t sure what to do. He asked our mentor since it was our first year there. Obviously, he suggested an apology and to tell her those words weren’t meant for her ears. As it turned out, Dean knew the girl’s father and she never said a word anyway. Everything turned out fine and we had many laughs over it. But for a first year, non-tenured teacher, it was quite a scare!
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During my first year of teaching I was conducting a high school orchestra rehearsal. I had noticed that one of the sections was behind by one beat. I stopped the group to fix the problem. “Seconds, you’re a beat off!” OH MY ! Did I just say that? I immediately moved on, “Ok rehearsal 37 here we, 1 – 2 – 3 – 4″…I had gone on so quickly few if anyone noticed. I learned instantly to say “A quarter note behind or ahead”!
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This happened a few years back at an unnamed school 
Why does a student bring a backpack to school on the last day?
Why, to dump two dozen grass snakes in the bathroom, of course!
As I’m walking down the hall, the custodian calls me over.
“Hey Pete,” he says holding a 5-gallon bucket, “Look in here.”
I jumped out of my skin as there were a half dozen or so snakes writhing around. Hopefully the rest found their way out of the school and back to their homes.
We quickly figured out who the culprit was (uh, the only one with a backpack) and the prankster was sitting in the office when I walked in to say my goodbyes.
“Yep, he did it.” Says a secretary.
Then the kid bolts! He runs of out of the office and outside. After a short hesitation I go running after him but his head start was too much. By that time, the office had already called the police and they apprehended him a few blocks from school.
What a last day of school!
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When I was in high school I auditioned for the all county jazz band. I had prepared several scales and solos on my electric bass.
There were 5 or so us going and after school us and our band teacher rode a school bus to the audition site.
In the warmup room I kept looking around for the other bass players. I was curious to see what the competition was like. We arrived early and there weren’t many students there yet.
Another bus load of students came in. Still no bassists.
Finally right before my audition I looked around. I was the only one!
I auditioned, and well, made the group.
I had to ask my director on the ride home, “Do I tell people I made the ensemble or that I was the only one that auditioned?”
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I was teaching in northern New York at a position where I traveled between five schools. My briefcase became my portable classroom with the necessary tools such as a tuner, metronome, grade book, and other assorted essentials. One morning I had to bring some instruments along with me from one school to the next. For some reason I put my cheap canvas briefcase in front of my car and then loaded the instruments.
I proceeded to get in, start the car and put it in drive. CRUNCH! Uh oh. I got out to see what it was. Oh my, I never retrieved my briefcase – with the the school’s rather expensive tuner in it. My heart pounded and began racing. I reached in for the tuner. It’s case was open and a square slider broken off. But it worked, thankfully it was still functional!
Enjoyed this a lot,Peter. : )